and so i came across this brilliant song

I am just going to come out and say it too. I LOVE her voice, and how she sings and how she carries herself.

I came across this song when I was out shopping for one of my precious disciples and this song was playing in Prints. I thought the song was brilliant and if I may put it this way, it is almost like the soundtrack of my life right now. Continually discovering my choice of guys was so wrong, through all the little things people observe and sometimes I choose to be blind to, and also discovering my choice to sever things with them can’t be more right. I am not being sour but I am just really glad I walked out of some harmful relationships. ๐Ÿ™‚ And came out stronger. That’s my takeaway, at least.

Enjoy the song. She’s such a treat for the ears. ๐Ÿ™‚ and the song title is really ingenious.

Best Thing I Never Had

What goes around comes back around (hey my baby)
What goes around comes back around (hey my baby)
I say what goes around comes back around (hey my baby)
What goes around comes back around…

There was a time
I thought, that you did everything right
No lies, no wrong
Boy I must’ve been out of my mind
So when I think of the time that I almost loved you
You showed your ass and I, I saw the real you

Thank God you blew it
I thank God I dodged the bullet
I’m so over you
So baby good lookin’ out

I wanted you bad
I’m so through with that
‘Cause honestly you turned out to be the (best thing I never had)
You turned out to be the (best thing I never had)
And I’m gonna’ always be the (best thing you never had)
Oh yeah, I bet it sucks to be you right now

So sad, you’re hurt
Boo hoo, oh, did you expect me to care
You don’t deserve my tears
I guess that’s why they ain’t there
When I think that there was a time that I almost loved you
You showed your ass and baby yes I saw the real you

Thank God you blew it
I thank God I dodged the bullet
I’m so over you
Baby good lookin’ out

I know you want me back
It’s time to face the facts
That I’m the one that’s got away
Lord knows that it would take another place, another time, another world, another life
Thank God I found the good in goodbye

I used to want you so bad
I’m so through with that
Cause honestly you turned out to be the (best thing I never had)
Oh you turned out to be (the best thing I never had)
And I will always be the (best thing you never had)
Oh, best thing you never had!

I used to want you so bad
I’m so through with that
Cause honestly you turned out to be the (best thing I never had)
Oh you turned out to be the (best thing I never had)
Oh, I will never be the (best thing you never had)
Oh baby, I bet it sucks to be you right now

What goes around, comes back around
What goes around, comes back around
I bet it sucks to be you right now

๐Ÿ™‚

what a confusing day

Don’t really know what’s going on with people lately. Some things they do, are really beyond my comprehension. It has been a trying period with different people and I seem to hitting left right center and being hit left right center myself. Maybe there are some people who can resist damage and walk away from a conversation in a nonchalant, uncaring manner, but I can’t, and it is getting tiring for me.

I don’t know if the wedding stress is getting to me, but I don’t think so. Maybe I am really starting to get comfortable with knowing myself and being comfortable being myself, such that I forget why some people do the things they do, as if I am unable to empathize with them. So, I guess, it’s a bad thing.

Just very tempted to lock myself in a air-conditioned room and read books, play the piano, listen to music, do arts and crafts, pray, cook and have lots of sleep, whenever I want to. But I guess that’s not the best solution either. :/

So I will just have to settle for a few hours myself everyday out at work for now. Maybeeeee it will get better after the wedding, when I have more free time to myself to think and daydream about anything and everything.

I am not emotional or whatever, but just thinking of all the things I feel like doing, even if it’s doing it alone. I can’t wait! So many things I want to try out, but with not enough time. (I found this really cool idea off Pinterest!!!) Just so that I can recharge and shine again. ๐Ÿ™‚

So yep. Yay.

holy weekend

the holy weekend just passed and I haven’t really had time to pause and think about it.

I never really saw Lent as important. I don’t know why. I can tell you the theory of it but I am not so good at feeling the appreciation for myself. But in recent years, I have been trying harder and harder to remember this weekend. I think I am getting better at it.

The weeks leading up to Holy Week has been quite eventful. Plenty of things to praise God for, and things to be upset about but still praise God for.

I have a lot to pray about, a lot to think about. Wish I could do this asap but my mind is kinda occupied with the upcoming TingsEEE wedding. I still have tons of work to complete but hey, I have been noting down my thoughts as I go along. I hope the fact that my memo app is on my home page means that I will definitely find time to sort out my thoughts in a coherent manner and start posting here again.

But all I can say, God is really good. I really thank God for my small cell and my kids. Why you guys so awesome, I will never fully comprehend. Thank God for loving me through loving all of you, and for allowing me to love you all. ๐Ÿ™‚ โค

Holy Saturday

Holy Saturday
Thinking.
About the people who are here today.
About the video we are watching.

Social acceptance and standards
Explaining away failure with whether it is God’s will or not, forces of God and Satan

Jesus prayed over Peter’s failure even before he was tempted. That he may not lose faith and come back to help his brothers after he has picked himself up. Not about Peter’s ability and capacity but God’s power, and he responded well. Not focusing on his own weakness and mistake but picking himself up to make up for what’s done. That even he gave up his life, it would mean nothing. What good would it do?

3 times of denial and after resurrection, 3 times of Jesus asking Peter if he loved Jesus.

ไฝ ็›ธไฟก่€ถ็จฃๅ—๏ผŸๅ…ถๅฎžไฝ ็›ธไธ็›ธไฟก่€ถ็จฃไธ้‡่ฆ๏ผŒไฝ†ๆ˜ฏๆˆ‘็Ÿฅ้“่€ถ็จฃ็›ธไฟกไฝ ใ€‚

It’s so hard to believe in someone who lets you down. It’s even harder to believe in someone who doesn’t even believe you exist.

May I never forget this feeling. That God you have faith in someone such as me. That God you saved me. That God you are good.

old songs revived!

For those who have been concerned about my well-being, I am alive. I am not eating too well. I developed this bad habit of losing my appetite drastically when I feel upset, but I think after 3 horrible days, it is finally back to the previous lousy form. Haha.

I am getting through this thing alright. I told God that it really hurts but the pain is just pointless. It is not helping me and it isn’t helping anyone else either. So I told God to please please make something beautiful out of it. There’s no point if I hurt and it stays here. Let it be something You can use for Your glory and Your people. Even in my pain, I rather be blessing someone than sit here and risk wallowing in self-pity for every hour I am left to my own dangerous mind. ๐Ÿ™‚ And so, God slowly showed me what I can do after I surrendered everything to Him once again and asked that He use my life and all that I am for His grand plan. Turns out I am not fighting this battle alone, but I am doing pretty well already. Feels like I am a very determined person uh? Well, I had to struggle for a few months before deciding to break up with my ex-boyfriend, and I had to struggle with this particular battle almost right when it presented itself – that’s about a year ago if I really wanted to count everything. So it is really not by my own strength but by His amazing amazing love and grace that I can decide to stand up on my feet to face another day. ๐Ÿ™‚ God is so good. I can’t help but feel so lucky that He can use me in this way. Kinda unexpected but out of my misery, I decided to ask for Him to use a broken person such as myself – and wow, turned out pretty good. ๐Ÿ™‚

So anyway, back to the title of the post. I am rediscovering super old songs in my phone. Haven’t been on spotify because the classics were too good to be true. Hahaha. SO ADDICTIVE. And somehow listening to this song really made me feel hopeful about the future and what it brings. Maybe it is telling me to stop holding on to people who are really not worth me breaking my heart over, and look forward to what God is preparing. Wherever you are, dear boy, please buck up in your preparations. I will, too. And then we can meet and start the next phase of honouring God together. Haha. On the bright side, I already have a pretty good idea what colour scheme I want for the church wedding. ๐Ÿ˜‰ There’s a lot of echo echo echoess in the song. But, so old school. I like. =D

I Can Love You Like That by All 4 One

They read you Cinderella
You hoped it would come true
That one day your prince charming would come rescue you
You like romantic movies
And you never will forget
The way it felt when romeo kissed juliette
And all this time that you’ve been waiting
You don’t have to wait no more
I can love you like that
I would make you my world
Move heaven and earth if you were my girl
I would give you my heart
Be all that you need
Show you you’re everything that’s precious to me
If you give me a chance, I can love you like that

I never make a promise
I don’t intend to keep
So when I say forever
Forever’s what I mean
I’m no casanova
But I swear this much is true,
I’ll be holding nothing back
When it comes to you
You dream of love that’s everlasting
Well baby open up your eyes…

I can love you like that
I would make you my world
Move heaven and earth if you were my girl
I would give you my heart
Be all that you need
Show you you’re everything that’s precious to me
If you give me a chance, I can love you like that