okay i guess i will wait a bit more and not try to kill myself over this, haha.

it can be quite tiring mulling over this, and then seeing the circumstances which tell a different story. so many different stories.

kinda unsure about where things will go.. and most importantly, where God leads. i just hope i do the right things in the right place in the right time.

clawing back slowly, and with a lighter heart, finally.

june and july, please be nice and full of good things.

giving up again

i really dislike this feeling of being vulnerable and open.

feeling like i am at the mercy of someone else’s decision or feelings.

and maybe that’s why i counter falling fast with detachment and moving on fast.

i don’t want to stay long enough to mull over stuff and consider and give space and what not..


staying long enough for a possibility is just merely asking to be stabbed right in the heart.


and i told myself i would stop doing that, and i don’t have many decades more to wait on stuff like this… and so i shall not.


i don’t need these people in my life..i wanted them in my life, but i am not sure if that feeling was mutual enough for people to warrant some action and effort.


and no, vi has no time to wait..she has to go.

need restttt

April was pretty much madness. Quite a bit of drama in my life and me feeling incredibly inadequate in facing them.

Very thankful for my friends and kids who are always there to shine some light into my dark existence. 🙂

I am back into a lot of uncertainty I guess. May is going to be crazy too, and I sure hope I will survive it. 🙂